T. Bag And The Revenge Of The T. Set Episode 10: The Ceremony

T-Bag has all the spoons and starts planning for the ceremony to make her more powerful with The High-T Lady who is under her spell.
The High-T Website synopsis

First lady of the T. Set

High-T Lady: Time and tide wait for no man, no woman either. Where are those spoons, I do hope Sally's alright.
(T-Bag appears).
T-Bag: No, Sally isn't alright and why? Because I've got the spoons.
High-T Lady: No.
T-Bag: Yes, oh yes. See, all eight of the little beauties and I really have you to thank.
High-T Lady: Me?
T-Bag: Yes. You gave the girl the charm which led her to the spoons, when she had the lot, bingo, I moved in and relieved her of her burden.
High-T Lady: Oh you evil creature.
T-Bag: Oh don't be so old fashioned. There's a lot to be said for evil you know. Gets such a bad press these days from all those weak-kneed namby-pamby goodie-goodies like you. Once you submit to the power of evil there's no looking back. Why don't you join me?
High-T Lady: Never.
T-Bag: Oh, go on, be a devil. Dip in your big toe and let the waters of wickedness wash over you.
High-T Lady: Don't try to win me over to your wretched ways T-Bag.
T-Bag: You fool! Don't you realise that now I have these there's no looking back? It's sink or swim woman. Join me or go under.
High-T Lady: I'll never join you.
T-Bag: Then go under. (T-Bag uses her magic to put the High-T Lady under her spell). You are now in my power, you will everything that I say.
High-T Lady: I will.
T-Bag: Tell me about the ancient ritual.
High-T Lady: When the stars converge and the great celestial formation is complete the spoons must be laid down here.
T-Bag: I know all that, what else do I have to do?
High-T Lady: You will find everything you need to know set out on the ancient scroll.
T-Bag: And where will I find the scroll?
High-T Lady: In the temple.
T-Bag: Where in the temple?
High-T Lady: I don't know.
T-Bag: What?
High-T Lady: I don't know where anything is since you changed everything in the temple.
T-Bag: Oh blast! I'll find it, I'll be back in a flash.
(T-Bag disappears, then Sally and T-Shirt appear).
Sally: Huh. Alright?
T-Shirt: Er, yeah.
Sally: Oh, we're back but not with good news I'm afraid.
T-Shirt: T-Bag's got all the spoons.
High-T Lady: Oh yes, wonderful isn't it?
Sally: Wonderful?
High-T Lady: Oh yes, now T-Bag will reign supreme and take her rightful place on the throne as first lady of the T. Set.
Sally: What? You've changed your tune.
T-Shirt: Or someone's changed it for her.
Sally: You mean she's in T-Bag's power?
T-Shirt: No doubt about it.
Sally: Oh great, that's all we need. Please snap out of it.
T-Shirt: Well that's no good, you'll never do it like that.
Sally: We've got to get her back, we need her.
T-Shirt: But no-one can resist T-Bag's magic.
Sally: Well I can.
T-Shirt: That's coz you've got that little whatsit there, it protects you.
Sally: I wonder. It's worth a try.
(Sally puts the pendant into the High-T Lady's hand which brings her out of T-Bag's spell).
High-T Lady: Oh, Sally, hello. Oh I feel funny.
Sally: T-Bag's had you under her spell.
T-Shirt: She's got the spoons.
High-T Lady: I remember. Oh quick, what's the hour? The stars. Oh look at that, we're running out of time, what are we going to do?
T-Shirt: Well where's T-Bag now?
High-T Lady: She's gone to the temple.
Sally: Right, T-Shirt we've got to go and get those spoons back off her.
T-Shirt: What, just like that?
Sally: We've got to try.
T-Shirt: I suppose so.
Sally: Oh, I forgot, you'd better give me this, just in case (Sally takes the pendant back). Oh, what if T-Bag comes back here first and you're not in her power.
High-T Lady: I'll just pretend I'm still in her power.
Sally: Oh, be careful.
High-T Lady: Off you go, now good luck and bye.
Sally: Bye, bye, thanks.
(Sally and T-Shirt leave).
High-T Lady: Bring me back those spoons.

Added: 04/04/2025

Lay out the spoons

High-T Lady: I am your faithful servant your Majesty.
T-Bag: Yes, I know you are. Well I've got the scroll and I've got the spoons. So let's get cracking.
High-T Lady: Arr, right.
T-Bag: You lay out the spoons and I'll have another squint at this thing.
(The High-T Lady sees the spoons have gone from the box).
High-T Lady: Oh.
T-Bag: What?
High-T Lady: Nothing. The children.
T-Bag: What are you wittering about? Will you lay out the spoons and be quick about it.
High-T Lady: The spoons?
T-Bag: Yes.
High-T Lady: These spoons?
T-Bag: Well naturally these spoons.
High-T Lady: You want me to lay them out?
T-Bag: What is the matter with you? Just lay out the spoons.
High-T Lady: Oh but it's far too early for that.
T-Bag: What do you mean too early? Five minutes ago you were squawking at me to hurry.
High-T Lady: Oh yes, we must hurry but there is still much to do.
T-Bag: There is?
High-T Lady: Oh yes, you see, first of all we must plot the co-ordinates.
T-Bag: Well don't just stand there like a ninny, get plotting.

Added: 04/04/2013

Playing for time

T-Bag: Come on, come on, what's the hold up?
High-T Lady: Oh there's no hold up, we can't rush these things.
T-Bag: What things? What are you doing?
High-T Lady: The calculations must be very precise.
T-Bag: Balderdash! I want to see those spoons laid out now.
High-T Lady: Oh but you can't lay them out too soon.
T-Bag: Alright, if you won't do it I will do it myself.
High-T Lady: You don't know what you're doing, it's not time yet.
T-Bag: Will you let go of that box.
High-T Lady: It's too early.
T-Bag: How dare you disobey me, let go of that box. (T-Bag sees the spoons are missing) Where are they?
High-T Lady: Where are what?
T-Bag: Don't play the giddy goat with me, where are the spoons?
High-T Lady: Have they gone?
T-Bag: You know full well they've gone, that's why you've been playing for time isn't it?
High-T Lady: No.
T-Bag: How could it happen, how? The children. The children were here weren't they? I knew it, I knew it. Where are they?
High-T Lady: I don't know.
T-Bag: Tell me.
High-T Lady: Alright, they were here but I don't know where they are now, I swear I don't
T-Bag: Curse and blast and double curse and blast again. I'll find them, I'll root them out. You wait here, I'll be back.

Added: 04/04/2013

Little Horrors

(T-Bag has to get the spoons from the children before time runs out, so she calls the High-T Lady and puts her under her spell once again and she makes her a cup of tea. T-Bag drinks the tea and pours the dregs into her saucer and after a while a picture appears in the saucer of where the children are).
T-Bag: And there they are, the only question is where is there?
High-T Lady: Looks like some sort of catacomb.
T-Bag: That's what I was thinking. What the fudge fingers is a catacomb?
High-T Lady: An underground tunnel.
T-Bag: Exactly, right. Under the temple I'll be bound.
High-T Lady: Yes but how did they get there?
T-Bag: I know (T-Bag walks over and turns the switch to the secret chamber) this must lead to the Stone Circle.
High-T Lady: Yes.
T-Bag: Good.
High-T Lady: What?
T-Bag: Now we have them!
High-T Lady: I don't understand.
T-Bag: You will. You wait here; I'll wait at the Stone Circle by the time I've found the little brats they'll be begging me to take the spoons back. Ha, ha, ha. Right you pair of little horrors here's some more little horrors to keep you company.
(In the passage way we suddenly hear a loud hissing sound. It's a snake!)
T-Shirt & Sally: Arrrgghh!
T-Shirt: We better go back.
Sally: We can't, we’ve got to go on.
T-Shirt: We'll never get past that thing.
(Sally slowly bends down and picks up a skull and she throws it at the snake. It disappears!)
T-Shirt & Sally: T-Bag!
T-Shirt: Oh no she's found out we’ve got the spoons. We're in for it now.
Sally: Don't worry she can't harm us so long as I'm wearing this (holds her silver pendant). Come on I'll lead the way.
T-Shirt: I'm not a baby, I’ll go first.
Sally: I don't care, let's hurry.
T-Shirt: Right.
(A large spider appears where the snake was).
Sally: Warrghh! It's not real (Sally bravely walks towards the spider).
T-Shirt: Sally!
Sally: It's not real, it's not real, it's not real. (The spider vanishes) See, now shall we go?
(They leave and we see Sally has dropped her pendant on the ground)
(Back at The Stone Circle)
T-Bag: Come on Kiddywinkles. I'm waiting. Time's running out!
In The T-Room
High-T Lady: Time's running out. Time's running out. If only I could find those little brats, how pleased Her Majesty would be with me, Oh yes, it would please Her Majesty.
(The High-T Lady picks up the burning torch and goes into the passageway to find Sally and T-Shirt).
Sally: Look.
T-Shirt: What?
Sally: Up there, light I think it's very faint but it might be a way out.
T-Shirt: Yes steps leading up. This is it what are we waiting for?
Sally: After you.
(A wall of flames appear, blocking their path).
T-Shirt: T-Bag! OK.
Sally: OK.
T-Shirt: Wow it's hot.
Sally: Oh yes.
(T-Shirt and Sally start walking through the flames).
T-Shirt: It's not really.
Sally: It's not really.
(T-Shirt and Sally pass by the flames).

Let the ceremony commence

T-Bag: There, done it. Just in the nick of time too. So what do you think of that? All that running and chasing and hiding here, there and everywhere, where has it got you? Nowhere.
Sally: Where's the High-T lady? What have you done to her?
T-Bag: Happily, I've no further need of that old bat. I know everything that I need to know. Nobody but nobody can stop me now.
(T-Bag strikes the ceremonial gong).
T-Bag: Let the ceremony commence.
(T-Bag strikes the ceremonial gong again).

Added: 04/04/2015

The Final destruction of Tallulah Bag

(T-Bag has got her powers from heavens and the High-T rushes to the stone circle to help the children. She arrives at the Stone Circle and starts untying the children from the post).
High-T Lady: Come on, we've got to get out of here!
Sally: But T-Bag!
High-T Lady: There's nothing we can do. It’s too late!
T-Shirt: There must be something.
High-T Lady: The only thing to do is flee, save yourselves, run!
T-Bag: You! Stay where you are! You pathetic mortals, see the power that I have!
(T-Bag zaps the ground causing a menacing explosion and she stares at them with evil intent).
High-T Lady: (She holds up Sally’s pendant) You can't harm us you monster!
T-Bag: Oh can't I?
(T-Bag zaps the pendant and the High-T drops it. It explodes on impact of the ground. T-Bag turns around readying herself to blast The High-T, Sally and T-Shirt to smithereens. Sally quickly grabs the ceremonial gong and uses it as a shield to protect them).
T-Bag: And now it's your turn. This is for all the trouble you three have caused me. Goodbye Forever!
(T-Bag hurls a ray of evil energy which hits the gong, reflects off it to strike T-Bag with an explosive sound, the thunder rages and T-Bag disappears with a blood curdling scream).

That old teapot

Thomas: Tea's up.
Sally: Uh, oh, oh thank you.
Thomas: Unusual that old teapot.
Sally: Yes.
Thomas: Looks almost real.
Sally: Hmm, glad it isn't though.
Thomas: Cheers.
Sally: Yeah, cheers.

Added: 06/06/2015