T. Bag And The Pearls Of Wisdom Episode 2: High Noon

The search for the pearls takes Sally to a Wild West town where the bank has been robbed but the robber hides the loot in Sally’s bag (sounds familiar) and she gets locked up in the jailhouse where the sheriff whose pearls it is wants to catch the real robber. T-Bag and T-Shirt try to get the pearl from the robber but he tells them Sally has the loot.
The High-T Website synopsis

In the next episode Sally travels west to find the next missing pearl. Will T-Bag get her hands on it first? Is Sally really a bank-robber? And who is the mysterious stranger who rides into town? Find out in T. Bag and the Pearls of Wisdom.
Next week preview (from previous episode)

Today, Sally travels west to find the next missing pearl. Will T-Bag get her hands on it first? Is Sally really a bank-robber? And who is the mysterious stranger? Find out now.
Stay tuned preview (from start of episode)

How does this saucer gadget work?

T-Bag: Come on, come on, come on.
T-Shirt: I'm coming.
T-Bag: Oh, don't take that tone with me sunshine. Right now show me again, how does this saucer gadget work?
T-Shirt: Well first of all you've got to drink the tea.
T-Bag: Well I know that.
T-Shirt: So drink it then.
T-Bag: Don't tell me what to do.
T-Shirt: You just told me to tell you.
T-Bag: That's neither here nor there.
T-Shirt: So drink the tea then.
T-Bag: Hmmm, mmmm, mmmm. Wonderful, wonderful. Right now what?
T-Shirt: Now you pour the dregs into the saucer.
T-Bag: Arrrgh, oooh, it's working, it's working, look at it. Oh, I love it, I love it!
T-Shirt: Any sign of Sally yet?
T-Bag: Don't rush me, there she is, there she is. Right Miss Sally, whatever your name is, let's see what you're up to.

Added: 04/04/2024

What do I do now?

T-Bag: Look, look, I've found one of the pearls, oh T-Shirt, I've found one of the pearls. What do I do now?
T-Shirt (sarcastically): Now we go down there and we get the pearl from the nice man.
T-Bag: Don't patronise me, it's getting on my nerves.

Added: 04/04/2012

Some low down, son of a rattlesnake

Sally: Excuse me.
Doc Leaf: Oh, not you again, I thought I told you to vamoose.
Pearl Starr: Freeze, nobody move.
Doc Leaf: Oh, tarnation.
Sally: What's going on?
Pearl Starr: Stay right where you are partners.
Sally: What is this?
Doc Leaf: Oh, some low down, son of a rattlesnake been and robbed the bank.
Sally: You're kidding?
Doc Leaf: I ain't kidding.
Sally: Who was it? Did you see anyone?
Doc Leaf: Happen I did.
Sally: Who? Where?
Doc Leaf: Ran off, that a way.
Sally: That way?
Doc Leaf: No, no, no, no. Not that way.
Sally: What way?
Doc Leaf: That way there.
Sally: Oh there.
Doc Leaf: Yeah, there.
Sally: I don't see anyone, I'll go and have a look.
(Sally leaves).
Doc Leaf: No, wait!
Pearl Starr: I said freeze buster.
Doc Leaf: Uh, bu, ha, ha, what did I do?
Pearl Starr: Don't you shoot me no hogwash Doc. You get your hands high.
Doc Leaf: I didn't do nothing.
Pearl Starr: You didn't do nothing, pwha... We'll soon see what you nothing did.
Doc Leaf: (He laughs as she searches him) Oh Sheriff, that tickles, I like it, do it again.
Pearl Starr: Don't you push your luck partner, somebody robbed that bank.
Doc Leaf: Well that somebody weren't me.
Pearl Starr: Well maybe it weren't you this time, but I'm warning you Doc. If you know anything about this, you better tell me now.
Doc Leaf: I don't know nothing.
Pearl Starr: Shucks.
Doc Leaf: Can I go now?
Pearl Starr: I reckon, but hear this, don't you go leaving town 'til I tell you, understand?
Doc Leaf: Sure Sheriff, sure, sure.
Pearl Starr: I gotta get that stuff back, half of it's mine.
Doc Leaf: Where in tarnation did that little girl go?

Added: 04/04/2023

Fools rush in

T-Bag: Well, what do you think eh? Not bad, eh?
T-Shirt: It's alright.
T-Bag: Alright, it's magnificent, I can do anything with these new powers of mine, absolutely anything. And I love it!
T-Shirt: Yeah, just be careful, don't go putting your foot in it like your sister used to do all the time.
T-Bag: There's no fear of that T-Shirt, fools rush in where angels fear to tread.
T-Shirt: Huh?
T-Bag: Oh, nothing, now you stay here and leave this to me, I will winkle that pearl off of that big oaf before you can say boo to a bison.

Added: 04/04/2013

You ain't never heard of The Kid

Doc Leaf: Ohhh. Ohhh, little girl, where are you? Yuhoo. Oh, blast, blast, blast, where is that little horror? (Sounds of horse trotting is the distance, T-Bag then appears) Ohhh!
T-Bag: Well, hello to you handsome. Say look who it isn't, the big bad bank robber himself. Who's been a naughty, naughty boy then?
Doc Leaf: I don't know what you're talking about lady, beat it.
T-Bag: Huh, touchy, eh?
Doc Leaf: I never robbed no bank.
T-Bag: Mmmmm. Mmmm, try telling that to the Kid.
Doc Leaf: Look lady, I ain't interested. What Kid?
T-Bag: What Kid. What you mean you ain't never heard of The Kid?
Doc Leaf: No I ain't
T-Bag: Well, lookie here.
Doc Leaf: Wanted, The Kid. The roughest, toughest, meanest little critter in the West. Oh.
T-Bag: Oh, and the Kid don't like no strangers operating on his territory. You understand what I'm saying here?
Doc Leaf: Well, all I did was rob the bank.
T-Bag: Now, I know that, and you know that, and when the kid knows that. Kwricchhheee.
Doc Leaf: Kwricchhheee!
T-Bag: Kwricchhheee!!
Doc Leaf: How come I never heard about the Kid until now?
T-Bag: Hmm, mystery to me Mister, ya know a guy just like you rode into town once. Big strapping fella, seven feet tall in his boots. He never heard of the Kid neither. He's buried up there on Dead Dog Hill.
Doc Leaf: Wel.. why.. wha.. wha.. what did he do?
T-Bag: I guess he sneezed too loud.
Doc Leaf: That the Kid shot him?
T-Bag: Sure the Kid likes shooting people, 'specially people who go robbing a bank before he has chance to rob it himself.
Doc Leaf: What am I gonna do?
T-Bag: Now, don't you fret, it just so happens that I'm a personal friend of the Kid's. Now if you hand over the items you stole from the bank I think I can square it with him for you. Give 'em over.
Doc Leaf: Yeah. No.
T-Bag: Whaaaat?
Doc Leaf: I ain't got them no more.
T-Bag: Don't lie to me.
Doc Leaf: Oh it's the truth, I ain't got 'em.
T-Bag: OK Mister, on your head be it. Now the Kid is arriving into town soon, yep. Be here at High Noon, so you better think careful about handing over that stuff else you'll be paying a little visit to Dead Dog Hill.
(Doc Leaf mumbles).

Added: 04/04/2017

No fun

T-Shirt: You mean I've got to pretend to be The Kid.
T-Bag: Yep.
T-Shirt: And I'm gonna go down there and ride into town, kick down the door of the saloon, start shooting, kapow, kapow, kapow. Pick up a table, throw it through the window. Crash! Right?
T-Bag: Wrong.
T-Shirt: What? No fighting?
T-Bag: No.
T-Shirt: No shooting?
T-Bag: No.
T-Shirt: No fun.
T-Bag: We're not here to have fun, I have already reduced that idiot to a blabbering jelly and one look from you and he will be begging to give you the goodies and the pearl (laughs). Go.

Added: 04/04/2015

That's the Kid

T-Bag: Well, where is it then?
T-Shirt: Be patient.
T-Bag: Be patient. I want the pearl, where is it?
T-Shirt: In Sally's bag.
T-Bag: Whaaat? What's it doing in there?
(Pearl Starr walks up).
Pearl Starr: Nobody move. Freeze, right where you are.
T-Bag: I beg your pardon?
Pearl Starr: You, Kid, you're under arrest.
(Sally comes round the corner).
Sally: T-Bag.
T-Bag: Uhh, Sally Simpkins. Sheriff, this lad is innocent.
Pearl Starr: No way, that's the Kid.
T-Bag: No it isn't, that's the Kid (points to Sally).
Sally: What!
Pearl Starr: What? You sure about that?
T-Bag: Sure, I'm sure, everybody knows the Kid is a girl.

Added: 04/04/2020